Tuesday, March 3, 2015

New Life

I had an interesting question posed to me recently. What can you do when the relationship is getting (for lack of a better word) stale? In spite of the fact that you are both doing all those things that you originally agreed to do for each other, one (or both) of you are getting a bit bored. It happens in any relationship, FLR or not.

When something like this happens to me, I turn to the Internet for ideas. First I talk with my partner about it and suggest he do the same. We both, though independently, look for something we have not tried before. Now, you might think that I am going to tell you that we (or you should) talk about the things you discover that interest you. Nope! What we do is try some of those things out without discussing them (assuming it can be done that way) and then talk about how we both felt afterwords.

If my husband comes up with something that requires me to do something different, of course, he can't do it without discussing it first. What he does then is to relate a fantasy about the particular activity. If I am the one who found something new, I will normally try it out just to surprise him.

Every one is different, so you will have to work things out your own way, but my first suggestion for when things start to get a bit stale is to turn to fantasy. Read stories, write stories, broaden your mind with what you can find out there.

All too often we get stuck (even on the Internet) with what we have, and we don't look for anything new and different. That is, we find things that have worked for us in the past, and never go back to Bing or Google to see what there might be that's new.

Like I said, do some research. Read other people's fantasies. See if you can't get something going in your own head, then present it to your partner and see if you are both interested. Who knows what lies around the next bend? All you can do is look for it. Reading always inspires me. It gets my brain to work a little overtime. Perhaps it will do the same for you.

Maybe you will find a way to pump new life into your daily grind...

Mistress Ivey

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