Friday, August 28, 2015

FLR Training Classes

I am proud to announce that, beginning in September, 2015, I will be teaming up with “Queenie” over at to help train women who want to setup or improve their Female Led Relationship. In the beginning, I will be monitoring her FLR Training Class as a student, as well as being a Guest Speaker for one of the classes. If you have been struggling with an FLR of your own, or you want to start one up with your husband, why don't you join me? It will be fun.

I am very excited about this opportunity to help Queenie teach other women how to become more dominant and to take charge of their Female Led Relationship.

Students will learn:
  • How to harness your feminine power
  • How to create protocols in your Female Led Relationship
  • How to correct rebellious submissive men
  • How to design your role in your Female Led Relationship
  • What power exchange means in a Female Led Relationship
  • How to understand your dominance style
  • How to become more confident as a dominant woman
  • How to stop being so nice all of the time
  • How to use your sexuality to motivate men

Finally! There is a training program that is not only for women, but that can really help you to make the most of your relationship. I would encourage all women whose husbands have been pushing them to become their Mistress or Goddess, to take this course. You will meet other women who have done it and some who, just like you, are learning to how.

All it takes is the courage to make the decision to invest in your future. If you want a better relationship, and you or your partner want you to be in charge, then you owe it to yourself to get the help you need to do it right. Sign up today!

Mistress Ivey

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

To Be Mean or Not To Be Mean?

That is the question when it comes to a typical FLR (Female Led Relationship). But there is another question involved here, and that is: What do you mean by “Be Mean?”
There are two completely different meanings to the the term “Be Mean.” The first, and most obvious, is to act like a “Bitch” toward your partner. You know, paddle him a lot just because you can, and order him around as if he doesn't really matter in the great scheme of things. And there is the other meaning... To do things to him that he will enjoy (for one reason or another), but that only “seem” to be mean.

Friday, August 21, 2015

Another Great Site

I had a very interesting discussion recently with a group of women. It was led by a woman who runs a Female Led Relationship Training program for women who want to create loving, Female Led Relationships but are having a hard time figuring out how to make things work. Her name is “Queenie” and she runs a website called ConquerHim, (

She invited me to be a guest speaker during her most recent FLR Training Class and I spoke via web conference call with the students. We spent a little over an hour discussing many aspects of Female Led relationships. I answered as many questions as I could, in the time allotted, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. You can read about the discussion on Conquer Him at

If you are interested in learning more about structuring your FLR and refining your dominance, I highly recommend looking into taking Queenie's training course Becoming a Goddess in a Female Led Relationship. (

Becoming a Goddess is a group training program where you will enjoy interacting with other women from around the world who want to develop their dominance and gain understanding about the dynamics behind creating loving, Female Led Relationships.

The training program is for women only and it lasts four weeks. It includes weekly LIVE discussions such as the one I participated in recently. Access to an online FLR Academy and a private Facebook group for daily discussions and support.

Becoming A Goddess does not tell you how to design your Female Led Relationship, but it does educate you on the many options for creating your ideal relationship and offers the support you need to make the best choices for yourself.

Mistress Ivey

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Getting Over Shyness

I get so many letters from women, most of whom are just starting some kind of Female Led Relationship (FLR), asking how to overcome their shyness. Maybe they have been asked to use a certain amount of verbal humiliation or, perhaps, they are not comfortable “talking” during their tease sessions. I personally went through a period of this kind of shyness when I was starting out so many years ago.
It can be difficult knowing what to say, especially if your partner wants you to humiliate him in some way. Perhaps he wants you to tell him how tiny his cock is, or what a poor excuse of a man he is for some reason. Or, maybe he just wants you to talk “dirty” to him while you are physically teasing him.
The solution to this problem is simple. Don't fret or worry about your “performance.” If you force yourself to do and/or say the kinds of things he wants, it will eventually become second nature and you will look back and wonder what all the fuss was about. You will learn to do it. It's like learning to ride a bicycle. It may take a few days or so for you to get comfortable with it, but eventually you will be good at it.
The worst thing you can do is worry about it. Stop worrying and just do it. Remember, this is the man with whom you have shared your deepest feelings. The man you let into the bathroom when you are peeing. The man who sees you naked every day. So why is it so hard to say a few negative or sexual things to him when you know he wants you to?
If it helps, you can try practicing in front of a mirror. A full length mirror works well. Or, if you want, you can imagine that you are playing a part, acting, in other words. You can think of this as simply a part in a play of sorts. Put simply, your fear is all in your head. You simply need to become comfortable with your role as Mistress (or whatever) and you will do fine.
All you really need is the right attitude. Take a lesson from the woman in the picture at the right. Does she look like she has a problem being in charge? If you look the part, you will feel the part. And practice makes perfect!
Mistress Ivey

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Femdom Fantasies 4

Well, I finally finished compiling and editing 'Femdom Fantasies Volume 4' for those of you who have been waiting for it. It is a longer book (104 pages according to Amazon) even though it contains fewer stories.

This fourth volume may not be the last, but I am currently writing another book with a December 1st deadline. (More on that later.)

Anyway, those of you enjoy Femdom type fantasies should really enjoy V4 because the stories are longer and more detailed that those in previous volumes. I am also planning to combine all four books into one larger volume including some bonus stories I think you will like. However, I am thinking of publishing it in paperback first, since none of the four books were published that way. It saves me publishing all four in paperback (which I find a pain in the butt). 
The Ultimate Guide To Tease & Denial
So for the next few months I will be working hard on bring you the 'Ultimate Guide To Tease & Denial' which should make a great companion to any of my other couples books. You can pre-order this book through Smashwords, Barns & noble, or Apple iToons. It won't be available through Amazon until some time in September. But if you pre-order it before December 1, 2015, you will get a 30% discount. So don't wait too long.

I am including as many forms, types, styles, and methods of teasing your partner as i can think of. I hope to make this book the number one book on tease and denial on the market. And with your help, together, we can make it.
Thanks for being my readers. You are appreciated!

Mistress Ivey

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Why Use Web Teases?

I have discussed this subject before, but it has been on my mind again of late. Most of you are aware that I have set up my own WebTease site. Well, all that work got me to thinking. What good does a site like that do for a couple who are already into chastity, tease, and denial? I mean, aren't web-teases for guys who, for whatever reason, masturbate a good deal of the time. I am not putting them down. God knows, they probably need the distraction. But most men in chastity can't masturbate, and the vast majority of them are written for men who can.

So why would I, of all people, start a masturbation site for men without Key Holders (KH)? Simple. Most KH's don't realize what a great source of tease and denial ideas web-teases can be. After all, most of us prefer NOT to allow our guys to masturbate. But I say, “Why not?” First of all, it relieves us of having to do it for them. I mean, there are times when I would rather not have to get my hands all messy with lubrication and make my arm sore from trying to edge him four or five times. Then there is the problem of accidents. I may blame my sub if he cums during one of these sessions, but the fault is really mine for not noticing exactly how close he was to ejaculation in the first place. That's something that takes a lot of practice, by the way. Take a look at last weeks post.

That's where web-teases come in. I find one I really like, or at least a portion of one, and I use it the next time he wants some attention, but I am too tired (or lazy) to tease him for an hour. Here's how I work it. I have three choices: 1) I can use the web-tease as a guide and follow the script to make him do everything to himself, or; 2) I can use ideas I have gotten from some of them to do things to him, or; 3) I can even load one up on the PC and watch as he attempts to do everything the woman in the web-tease tells him to do.

Now, some of the web-teases can take several hours to complete. So if I am having him do one online, I either set aside enough time, or I stop him when I think he has had enough. If he is doing one online, I can also help him by handing him the next item he needs or by cleaning them when he has finished in anticipation that he might need it again. I can even be his timekeeper when he needs one. Either way, they can be very entertaining. Especially when he has to ruin his own orgasms. I just love watching the looks that cross his face. Don't forget, masturbation carries with it a certain amount of humiliation for most men. They just don't like doing it front of you.

So there you have it. Yet another way to tease and deny him without having to tire yourself out. Besides, after watching him ruin his own orgasms puts me in the mood to have a few orgasms myself!

Mistress Ivey