Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Be Mean To Me

A common theme (or desire) among men who want to live in a Female Led Relationship is the desire for a woman to be “mean” to them. The question is, what is “mean?”

To most men, being mean to them has very different definitions. If you are in an FLR you need to know what your partner's definition is, whether you are a man or a woman. After all, don't you both want to be on the same page, so to speak?

To one man, “being mean” might mean ruining his orgasms, while another man's idea of “being mean” could be long periods in chastity. The fact is, it is a very personal thing and if you, as the one in charge, don't fully understand what your partner thinks is “being mean,” then you have no way of knowing if you are doing those things he really (perhaps secretly) wants you to do.

I have put a pole up for men to indicate what “being mean” means to them. Hopefully, the result will make us all wonder if we are doing the right things. It may be cause to sit down and discuss it thoroughly with our respective partners so that we can evaluate what we are doing and if we should, perhaps, change our approach somewhat.

Naturally, the only way to gain the knowledge needed is to communicate. Your partner may have difficulty talking about this. Perhaps he doesn't want to sound like he is dictating to you, or telling you what to do for him. If your partner has difficulty talking with you about this subject try ordering him to put his deepest desires in writing (perhaps an email or a journal entry) so that you can read it in privacy. He should also understand that there will be no repercussions for anything he writes or says during your discussion.

Take the time to learn all you can. It can only help your relationship.

Mistress Ivey

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