Talking During Sex (Pt-2)

So you want to learn how to talk during sex, huh? Well, it all begins with knowing your partner’s fantasies. Last time, I talked about the feelings of vulnerability and humiliation. I told you that you needed to talk about things that would either terrify or humiliate your partner in order to turn him on. But how do you know what those things are?

You have to do your homework! You have to learn to listen and to use what you learn against him. I can tell you things to say until I am blue in the face, and they may or may not work for you. But if you do your own research, find out what REALLY turns your partner on, you won’t need me to tell you anything. You will know what to do and what to say.

Talking During Sex (Pt-1)

Why is it that we women have such difficulty talking sexually to our husbands during sex? I know that many women have this problem. I saw a survey (somewhere) that where almost eighty percent of the respondents said they had trouble talking “dirty” to their spouses. I had this problem when I first got with my husband. I don’t know why I was afraid to talk dirty to him, but I was.

Back when I was his slave, and he did most of the “action” during sex (I was usually the one tied down and sometimes gagged) he did all the talking. He would tell me things of a sexual nature without batting an eye. He would hold up a knife, look me in the eye, and say something like, “We are just going to draw a little blood.” No, he never actually did draw blood, but he planted the idea of it in my head so clearly, that after he placed a blindfold over my eyes, and I felt the cold steel touch my skin, I was positive he had cut me. As I said, he never did actually cut me, but the thought of being totally at his mercy, knowing that he could cut me anywhere he wanted, thrilled me.

Differences Between Male & Female

No, I don’t mean anatomically, nor do I mean mentally. What I am referring to here is how the world treats males differently than females (just in case you hadn’t noticed).

A man runs naked across the basketball court of a Big 10 game during half-time. He is immediately arrested. Hauled off to the poky where he will no doubt be held on charges of indecent exposure, be stood in front of a judge who will, no doubt, slap him with a huge fine. His name, may or may not, ever be found on the front pages of any newspapers anywhere. His friends will pat him on the back and tell him what great thing he did while buying another beer at his favorite sports bar.

Slave -v- Sub

Well, it’s a whole new year! Whatever your dreams, I hope they all come true.

I have been in the BDSM community for many years. My husband even longer. I have heard debate after debate as to exactly what the difference is between a “slave” and a “submissive.” My understanding is that there have been these same debates for years and years before I was even born. So I want to clear a few things up.

First of all, I am sure there are those who will want to argue with me about it. Fine, post your comments. I DO read them all. Even though I don’t always reply to them, I do read them. They are automatically emailed to me. So I read each one carefully before deciding to which I want to respond.