Saturday, April 2, 2011

To Chastise or Not to Chastise

That is so often the question facing couples who engage in a female led relationship (FLR). But the answer is much simpler than it sounds. I created this blog for those women who have little (or no) experience with sexually controlling their man. Even though a chastity device can be a great way to accomplish that, it may not be desirable, or even necessary.

Male chastity has become a very popular 'kink' these days. You can now purchase a chastity device at your local sex store, not to mention every sex toy store on line. But just because it is popular is no reason to jump on the band wagon. There are as many reasons to use a chastity device as there reasons not to.

Perhaps your partner feels too uncomfortable. Maybe the device you have chosen does not really fit as well as either of you would like. Of course, you could have one custom made, but even then, you may have problems. Let's face it, male chastity (in its popular form) is a fairly recent addition to the kink scene.

There are literally thousands of stories on the Internet about women who have put their man (or men) in chastity and have kept them that way for years at a time. Though there may be a few who actually have, they are very rare. My point is, male chastity is so new to the scene that is highly unlikely that more than a handful of couples have been into it that deeply. The past ten years have witnessed a huge growth in male chastity. Before that, very few people actually practiced it at all.

The truth about male chastity is that many couples only practice it occasionally for relatively short periods of time. Male chastity is like any other kink, it's fun for awhile, but if you practice it constantly for years at a time, chances are the thrill will fade and the enjoyment could vanish altogether. If it turns boring, no one will want to do it.

It is my opinion that many couples would do better using tease and denial techniques to keep their sex lives interesting. Although male chastity is often a big part of tease and denial, it is by no means necessary. Even if you have one of those partners who will masturbate in private when he has been denied an ejaculation or two, that is no reason that you have to run right out and spend a couple hundred bucks on a chastity device.

There can be enough pleasure (hopefully for the both of you) in teasing that even the denial does not have to be an integral part of your play. More often than not, when a woman enjoys teasing her partner's cock (at least physically), she will extend her play far longer than would ever happen in a standard love-making session. After all, teasing can be great fun for both partners. So whether you incorporate denial, much less chastity, in your play, chances are you will both be more satisfied. Isn't that the point of teasing in the first place?

So whether or not you choose to engage in male chastity, tease and denial can help improve your sexual enjoyment. So, the use of a chastity device on your partner is simply a matter of choice. It is something you should discuss in depth, both the pro's and the con's, before jumping right in. I suggest, if you are interested in male chastity, start out slowly and as inexpensively as you can.

Mistress Ivey

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