More
of What Men Really Want
I am sorry
for not including everything men want in my last post. but let's face
it, men are greedy when it comes to sex! So there are a lot of things
men want. Not to mention that each man is different and you should do
your best to figure out what some of those things are. Also, his
desires will, more than likely, change over time. What he finds
humiliating today, may not be enough for him tomorrow.
I will
probably receive a lot of grief for this one, but one of the things
men really want from male chastity is humiliation. Come on now... The
fact that he wanted to have his jewels locked up so that only one
person would have control of when and how he ejaculates is pretty
humiliating. So, don't even try to deny it guys.
If you talk
with your chaste hubby, it should be easy to find a few things that
he wouldn't mind doing, even though they are a bit humiliating. Would
he rather be punished by having to hold a penny against the wall, or
be paddled? By-the-way, either one of those is humiliating. Make him
insert a butt-plug before you take him shopping. Chances are, he will
feel humiliated even though no one else knows he is wearing it.
Of course,
not all things will be that easy to discover. The best way to find
out is to assign him a task or chore and watch his reaction. If he
flatly refuses to do it, don't get angry or throw it in his face that
this was all his idea. Instead, ask him why he doesn't want to do it.
Let him explain himself and then you can move on to something else.
It is a
good idea to work up a contract, but if you are in a trial period for
say, a week or two, or even a month, it would be best to make a note
of the things he refuses to do. That way, you can put those
limitations into your first contract. You will have limitations also,
but you won't need to put them into a contract. After all, YOU are
the Keyholder and, therefore, YOU make the rules. But just because
you can make the rules, you should refrain from making rules that
might make your partner hate chastity. Let's be honest here, it's
better to make a few concessions than to ruin the whole thing by
being stubborn. There will be time for that later.
Learning
what your guy wants is an on-going process. Not just because it
changes a lot, but because there may be things you never thought of.
Again, pay attention to the stories he reads. Have him tell you about
them, or simply read them yourself. You can get a great many ideas
from the stories he reads. You also want to talk about them while you
are teasing him. Use the stories as insights into what he likes.
Tease him by telling him that you want to do something he read in one
of those stories. If he likes the idea, he will probably not admit
it, but if hates the idea he will let you know!
Until next
time,
nemo
For
more in-depth information, consider one of theses books:
The punishment exciting!
ReplyDeleteHumiliating if not working
erection at the required time.
Here is the help from the partner!
Sorry, Nemo, but I have to disagree with you about the "humiliation" aspect. Neither Mrs Edge nor I are interested in humiliation. For us, "enforced chastity" is more a kink about *control*. Mrs Edge enjoys knowing that she has control over my sex, erections, and orgasms; she enjoys knowing that she can easily (and constantly) keep me aroused. To her, and aroused husband makes her feel sexy and attractive.
ReplyDeleteOn my end, I enjoy turning over that control, and I really like the constant low-level buzz of arousal. If she started finding things to humiliate me with, I'd lose interest pretty quickly. And on her end, if I asked for some humiliation, she would be very uncomfortable with that. Mrs Edge wants to think of me as strong and competent, and in her mind, "making me" perform some humiliating task would take that away.
I must also disagree. Humiliation is a different sort of kink than enforced chastity. In my case, we practice both, but things you identify as humiliating (spanking, standing in the corner) may feel humiliating, but I think are further expressions of control.
ReplyDeleteYou may find surrendering control humiliating. I don't. Mrs. Lion can make me do humiliating things if it arouses me. But our base power exchange has nothing to do with it. My chastity is never part of any BDSM things we might do.
There is no humiliation as part of our enforced chastity. My wife controls my orgasms and I have accepted that as part of our marital arrangement.
ReplyDeleteOkay, then... I stand corrected. For many people, humiliation is NOT a part of the game. But for many, it is. In fact, I have spoken with many men who enjoy the fact that they feel humiliated just gong out in public while locked up. It gives them a little thrill thinking that other people might figure it out.
DeleteTo each his own...
so true.
Delete