Training for Submissive Men

I know that I wrote a blog post about how submissive men should not be trained by anyone but their prospective Female Dominant. My reasoning was simply that there was no proper training available. In 99% of the cases I could find, a man was only getting his kinky side satisfied and NOT getting the information he really needs to find a good Dominant woman, or how to begin to serve her properly. That is, until now.

I, along with Queenie of ConquerHim.com and a few other Dominant women have gotten together to set up a training program that I think will give the submissive male everything he needs to find, and properly serve, the woman of his dreams. I believe that this new training program will be a great success and help many men to achieve their own goals in setting up an FLR (Female Led Relationship) with the right woman.

Are You Truly Submissive?

Are you truly submissive, or are you just kinky? That's the question you men should ask yourselves. You women should ask yourselves if you are truly in an FLR or are you just a dominant for his kink?

Many men, women too, mistake leadership in an FLR for dominance in kink. If you are doing kinky things for your partner because that's what he wants, but you are not getting what you want from the relationship, then you are just playing dominant to his kink. If he were truly submissive, then he would be fulfilling all your hopes and dreams, desires, and kinks, without expecting anything in return. That much is fact.

An FLR is not a sexual relationship. It is a lead and follow relationship. That is, as the leader of the relationship, you, as a woman, should be getting anything and everything you want. Only then, should you feel the need to reward your submissive with sexual favors that he wants, whether they be kinky or not.

An Honest Review

I just completed the FLR (Female Led Relationship) course offered by ConquerHim.com. Even though I was asked to teach a class on Tease & Denial as part of the course, I must admit that I actually learned quite a bit.

Queenie, the course creator and instructor, brings out the best in each student. Her winning personality comes through as she challenges each student to be the best “Goddess” they can be. The lessons are personalized through a question and answer period at the end of each one. Not only the classes were interesting and informative, they were actually fun.

Cuckold Caution

I recently received a message from one of my friends on Facebook. She is one of the rare ones who asked for my advice and then actually followed it. It is so often that I give advice to someone who, in the end, totally disregards it that I wonder why they asked me in the first place. Then when all is said and done, they wonder why things did not work out as they had hoped.

This particular friend, we will call her “M,” told me that her husband had been begging her to cuckold him for well over a year. Cuckolding was something that “M” was really not comfortable doing but could not convince her partner that it would not be a good idea. After over a year of listening to her husbands constant begging, she decided to try something I had suggested.

Approaching Your Wife

This is probably the hardest question I ever get from men who want to turn their relationship into a Female Led Relationship (FLR). Why? Because every woman is different. There is no simple answer to that question. So here is my recommendation...

The first thing you must do is to make your desires known. If you can't sit down with her and tell her that you want her to be in charge of your life, sex life, or just try some tease and denial, then you will never get what you want from her. It's that simple.

You should know that even if she jumps at the chance to become your Mistress, to take complete control of you and all you do, she will NOT do exactly what you dreamed she would do. She is her own woman. She will have to learn how be dominant, at least toward you. You cannot tell her how to do anything! The more you do that, the less chance you have of being successful.

The Basic Ingredient for All Female Led Relationships

(Reprinted from ConquerHim.com)

People may argue about whether or not a Female Led Relationship needs to use chastity control to work well. They may also debate about whether or not the man is inferior to the woman in the relationship. Of all the debates and options all couples may encounter while structuring their Female Led Relationship there is one common ingredient that must be the foundation for any and all Female Led Relationship: honoring a woman’s choices.
Whether a couple participates in a FLR by choice or by nature, the one thing that is common is the man’s decision to honor the woman’s choices.
If you are in a FLR and you are wondering whether you are ‘doing it right’, you should understand that when you honor the choices of the woman you are with, then you are doing it right.

• When she asks to be treated a certain way, as a man you should honor that.
• When she says she wants chicken for dinner, as a man you should honor that.
• When she wants to be left alone, as a man you should honor that.
• When she says she is ready to try a new career, as a man you should honor and support that.
• If she tells you she is not interested in an idea that you present to her, as a man you should honor that.
• If she wants to try a new idea during your intimate moments, as a man you should honor that.
• If she wants you to make some of the decisions on your own, as a man you should honor that.
• If she wants to cuddle and be comforted, as a man you should honor that.
  

You do not need whips, chains, foot worship, spankings, sexual control or forced domination to classify your relationship as a FLR. The aforementioned options are fetishes and kinks and may be used to motivate the submissive man but, if a man truly wants to participate in a FLR, he will not need any of those things because his desire to please the woman he loves comes from his heart.
If a man is trying to convince you that you can not have a FLR without dominating him forcefully, placing him in chastity or making him kiss your feet he is either misinformed or he is being manipulative.
All he needs to do is place honoring the woman’s preferences and choices as the number one priority and you have successfully created a FLR.

By Queenie
ConquerHim.com

FemDom-v-FLR

Please, do not confuse a Female Led Relationship with a FemDom relationship. These are actually two different things. Although, they may have a some aspects that cross-over, or are similar in nature, they are very different animals.

A typical FemDom relationship is more about the sexual aspects where the female totally dominates the male in and by sexual means. There may be may, or may not, be any actual love between the two partners. Usually, the male is treated as if he has no rights at all, or that what he wants, likes, dislikes, don't matter at all. In fact, he may be in it for the mistreatment and not for the love.