Not In Your Butt!

Ladies and gentlemen, it has come to my attention that many of you enjoy (or would like to enjoy) anal sex of some sort. That is, the realm of male chastity (not to mention tease and denial) often includes some sort of anal play. While in and of itself, anal play is not a bad thing, you need to be careful what you put in your guy's ass.

Let's face it, it can be very tempting to use ordinary household items. Some may seem like a good idea at the time, but rest assured, most can have negative results. I know, if you happen to be into humiliation, there is nothing quite as humiliating as a trip to the emergency room to remove that jar of peanut butter you shoved into your guy's ass and just can't seem to retrieve, now.

Watch this video and you will see what I mean.

Now that you have an idea of what NOT to put into your butt, let me give you some suggestions as to what you CAN put there. My store carries a full line of Tantus^(R) products designed for use by both male and female users. If you want to put something in your butt, I highly recommend you try one these products instead of what you find around the house.

Tantus products are all designed to be of the highest quality. That means that they will be comfortable (or as comfortable as an anal device can be), and will last you a good long time. In fact, I have used many of the Tantus products and I believe that, even though you might be able to purchase a similar product for less, you can't match the quality. And let's face it, quality counts. Especially when you are going to insert it into your (or your partner's) body.

We also carry a full line of lubricants. You are going to need one! The rule of thumb for using lubricants for any anal activity is: When you think you have enough, double it! That basically means that you can't have too much lubrication when it comes to anal sex.

Have fun, and be safe. Don't end up at the ER!

Mistress Ivey

P.S. If you start out with the Cowboy, don't try to push it ALL THE WAY IN the first time!

Safe Sex Tease?

Okay, maybe using a condom during teasing is not what people are referring to when they talk about safe sex. But... Have you ever tried teasing his cock with a condom on it? Maybe you should.

Condoms come in all types (lubricated, ribbed and even flavored) and styles. If you plan to use them for teasing you don't want any of that nasty-tasting spermicide on them. Trust me, it is nasty-tasting! If your guy has a tendency to spurt before you are ready, a condom might be just the thing. After all, regardless of what the manufacturers may tell you, they do reduce sensitivity. Of course, the more you apply, the less sensitive he will be.

Now don't get me wrong, I am not saying that you want to put ten or twelve condoms on your guy and eliminate him feeling anything. Far from it. I am only suggesting that there are many reasons you might want to use a condom while teasing him. Let me explain, aside from the fact that it can delay his orgasm (which is a good reason to use one), a condom can be used to eliminate having to clean up every time you ruin an orgasm. Especially if you intend to continue and ruin a few more.

Condoms work very well for prostate milking, too. After all, just how easy is it to catch all that cum in a little cup? And just think, when you are done, he can drink it right from the condom. It's a bit more humiliating that way, but hey, why not? After all, many men love to be humiliated.

Have you ever given a guy blow-job while he was wearing a condom? It's little different, but it works. It just takes longer, that's all. But then, if you are teasing him (and that IS what we are talking about here, isn't it?) you want it last a good long time without fear of an “accident.” Condoms are good for a great number of things. Use them to cover any toy that you are going to insert (no mater where you are going to insert it). It's cleaner and safer that way. Besides, cleanup is a breeze!

Here's a little video to demonstrate what I mean. Sorry the quality isn't that good, but videos like this are very hard to find.

I am sure you can think of ways to use a condom that I have not mentioned here. If so, drop me a line or post a comment and tell me about it.

Mistress Ivey

Finger Touch Tease

The video below is my first attempt at embedding a video into my blog. This particular video demonstrates how to perform a one (or two) finger tease. As tease and denial videos go, the are actually very few that don't end in an orgasm. Be that as it may, many do show ruined orgasms and are, therfore, applicable to this blog.

In the video below, I want you to pay particular attention to two things: 1) Watch how the woman uses one or two fingers to tease her victim's penis. It's very good example how to touch certain sensitive spots that will give you the reactions you want, and; 2) Notice how the victim's penis reacts when this woman touches those sensitive spots. His reactions are, for the most part, uncontrollable. They are simply natural reactions that he has no control over. 

All in all, this video is an excellent example of how little you need to do to get your man to the point of no return. What you do then is up to you. If you want to keep your guy on edge, just give his cock a few seconds to rest every now and then. You can see how this works if you pay close attention to the video. If you want to ruin his orgasm (perhaps several in a row), simply stop when you think he is about to ejaculate. If you stop too soon, no harm done. he simply won't ejaculate. If you stop too late, he still might not have a full orgasm because you did stop. This is an excellent method for learning exactly when to stop whether you are trying to edge him or ruin his orgasms.

I hope this video will make your tease and denial sessions more successful.

Mistress Ivey

Light Tease Example

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Forced Chastity

I recently read another blog about “forced” chastity. About the only thing with which I agree concerning that post is that you can't really force chastity on anyone. Let's look at the facts...

• No man who doesn't want to be locked in chastity is going to allow someone to lock a device on him .
• No device (yet) made can't be defeated, no matter what kind you have.
• If a chastity device were placed on a man against his will, he could easily bring criminal charges against the perpetrator.

With that in mind, I would like to discuss what many men DO like. Many men, especially those involved in chastity, have fantasies about being “forced” to do any number of things. Some want to be forced to wash the dishes, some want to be forced to wear a woman's clothing, and some even want to be forced to watch their wife have sex with another man. The truth be told, these are all just fantasies. I'm not saying that they won't experience any of these things, but the truth is they want to pretend that they are being forced.

There is a certain amount of sexual excitement in being forced to do things that are considered to be outside the range of “normal.” Normal, meaning accepted by society as whole, or not thought of as “kinky” by non-kinky folks. All the person is looking for is an added thrill that would not be there if they were not “forced” to perform some activity.

When I was slave to my husband, there was a thrill in not having to make any decisions at all. Our sexual, or kinky, activities took on a more exciting, more intense, feeling simply because nothing I was doing was my idea. I had no choice. I had to do what I was told. Being bound only adds to the thrill because, no matter what happens to me, I was not the one who was doing it. I was being “forced” to do it.

All most men want is for someone else tell them what to do. They want to be relieved of responsibility for their actions. Their sexual actions, anyway. Men's fantasies are as widely varied as snowflakes. There are no two alike, especially where their fantasies are concerned. Not only do these fantasies vary from man to man, they often vary from day to day in the same man. That is, a man's fantasies are constantly changing, evolving, from moment to moment.

The thought of being “forced” to do anything in these fantasies only adds to the excitement of the particular fantasy. Therefore, the desire to be “forced” to perform certain acts becomes stronger with each passing day unless, and until, the fantasy is realized. This is true of any fantasy.

If you are not completely up to date on exactly what your man is fantasizing, you need to learn about them. After all, the best way to control any man is through his fantasies!

Mistress Ivey

Web-Teases What Are They Good For?

I have discussed this subject before, but it has been on my mind again of late. Most of you are aware that nemo and I have started our own WebTease site. Well, all that work got me to thinking. What good does a site like that do for a couple who are already into chastity, tease, and denial? I mean, aren't web-teases for guys who, for whatever reason, masturbate a good deal of the time. I am not putting them down. God knows, they probably need the distraction. But most men in chastity can't masturbate, and the vast majority of them are written for men who can.

So why would I, of all people, start a masturbation site for men without Key Holders (KH)? Simple. Most KH's don't realize what a great source of tease and denial ideas web-teases can be. After all, most of us prefer NOT to allow our guys to masturbate. But I say, “Why not?” First of all, it relieves us of having to do it for them. I mean, there are times when I would rather not have to get my hands all messy with lubrication and make my arm sore from trying to edge him four or five times. Then there is the problem of accidents. I may blame nemo if he cums during one of these sessions, but the fault is really mine for not noticing exactly how close he was to ejaculation in the first place.

That's where web-teases come in. I find one I really like, or at least a portion of one, and I use it the next time he wants some attention, but I am too tired (or lazy) to tease him for an hour. Here's how I work it. I have three choices: 1) I can use the web-tease as a guide and follow the script to make him do everything to himself, or; 2) I can use ideas I have gotten from some of them to do things to him, or; 3) I can even load one up on the PC and watch as he attempts to do everything the woman in the web-tease tells him to do.

Now, some of the web-teases can take several hours to complete. So if I am having him do one online, I either set aside enough time, or I stop him when I think he has had enough. If he is doing one online, I can also help him by handing him the next item he needs or by cleaning them when he has finished in anticipation that he might need it again. I can even be his timekeeper when he needs one. Either way, they can be very entertaining. Especially when he has to ruin his own orgasms. I just love watching the looks that cross his face. Don't forget, masturbation carries with it a certain amount of humiliation for most men. They just don't like doing it front of you.

So there you have it. Yet another way to tease and deny him without having to tire yourself out. Besides, after watching him ruin his own orgasms puts me in the mood to have a few orgasms myself!

Mistress Ivey

More On P.O.T.

The term “Post Orgasm Torture,” in itself, sounds almost horrible. Let's face it, any time you use the word “torture” you conjure up all sorts of medieval, horrific images. So I will just call it “Post Orgasm Torment.” I think that is a less terrifying phrase.

I have run across many women who don't understand exactly what I mean by POT, so let me clarify exactly what I am talking about. To put it bluntly, the head of a man's cock becomes extremely sensitive immediately after he cums. You may have discovered this yourself, probably by accident. Or you may have never experience it. Take heart, every man has this sensitivity.

It seems that the vagina is actually too well lubricated for normal intercourse to effectively produce the torment we are talking about here. Most men can continue to thrust their penis in and out of a woman after they ejaculate until their erection shrinks on it's own, without any discomfort at all. That's because there is so much lubrication (including his own semen) that he really can't feel anything. At least not on the head of his cock.

Let me warn you, if you engage in POT, your partner will (if you are doing it right) become almost violent. The problem is not that you are hurting him, it's simply that the extreme sensitivity makes them react in any way they can to stop it. It's like being held down and tickled. If you have ever been tickled until it became so intense that you find yourself fighting to stop it, well, you have experienced a little of what POT can be for the average male.

Most males, especially those who have not experienced much POT will not be able to control their reactions to it. Basically, what you will be doing is tickling them in the most sensitive spot on their entire body! In spite of what it may seem (or he may tell you) it does NOT hurt them. They will do absolutely anything to make you stop. They will scream, they will squirm, they will beg, and, in fact, try to make you believe that you are seriously hurting them. But in spite of what they do, or say, the fact is, you are tickling them.

Now that you know the truth about POT, let's talk about the best way to torment them post orgasm. Because of their potentially violent reaction, I strongly recommend that you (at the very least) bind their hands behind them. It is better to tie them down so that they are not able to move much at all. By the way, this is an extremely fun way to torment them!

Once you have your guy securely bound, go ahead and tease him any way you like. You can edge him, or anything else you enjoy doing up to, and including, the point at which he begins to “spurt.” Go ahead and allow him a full orgasm (otherwise this won't work).

As soon as his cock's throbbing begins to subside, take hold of the shaft and hold on tight. Using your other hand, rub the head of his cock with your fingers or palm. Do this gently, as that is all it will take. Instantly he will protest. Remember, he is NOT being hurt! He is being tickled! How long you can continue doing this will vary from man to man. But you should be able to do it for at least 10-30 seconds for the average guy. Sometimes you can go even longer.

Another method is to continue stroking his cock after orgasm. If you bring him to orgasm by stroking his cock, you simply continue stroking as long as your hand slides gently up over the head with each stroke. This method is not quite as effective, but should still give you an idea of what is possible. The problem is, every second of rest his cock gets, brings him closer to the point where it will no longer be so sensitive. But either way, you should still enjoy a few seconds of extreme sensitivity. Stroking the shaft does nothing. It's the head that is sensitive!

Don't listen to anything he says. He is only trying to prevent further torment. Again, you are NOT hurting him. But he will act as if you are. If you try this, please write me and let me know how it went. I would love to hear from you. Have fun with it!

Mistress Ivey