Friday, October 15, 2010

Ruined Orgasms (or Milking)

I love to ruin a man's ejaculations (often called milking). Why would someone want to do that? If, like me, you are into male orgasm denial and control, then you understand the reasons. It's to keep him healthy and horny. After all, a hard man is good to find. The longer I can keep him hard (or the more often I can get him hard) the better. There are really a number of reasons to milk a man instead of allowing him to cum in a normal fashion:

Humiliation: It can be very humiliating to a slave to be “milked” and many men actually enjoy it.
Control: A man who has not had a normal ejaculation for some time will do almost anything to have one.
My own pleasure: Like many women, I enjoy teasing my slave to the point that he will do anything for the privilege of ejaculating.
His pleasure: A man's pleasure is derived from arousal more than it is from ejaculating.
His Health: If a man does not ejaculate periodically (several times a month) he may develop prostate problems including prostate cancer. Milking is a good substitute for normal ejaculation.

Over the years I have used several techniques to milk a man's ejaculate from him without allowing him the pleasure of a normal orgasm. I use different techniques for different purposes. There are four basic kinds of milking that you can do. The first three are often called “ruined” orgasm methods because he does cum, but the experience is ruined and he does not get the full enjoyment of a normal ejaculation (and he will stay aroused). The key to proper milking, no matter which method you use, is practice!

Squeeze the Tip: With this method you are going to actually stop his ejaculation after it begins. Again, you stroke his cock until the instant that he begins to cum then stop it. You can wrap your first finger and thumb around the tip of his cock just below the glans (the hood-like section) very tightly. You must squeeze this spot very tightly until the throbbing subsides. You can also press the palm of your other hand or your thumb tightly against the very tip (where the hole is) to help hold back the ejaculate. Once his cock quits trying to pump his semen out you can release your grip. A small amount of semen may squirt, spurt, shoot or just ooze out the instant you release his cock. Do not be alarmed. This is normal. As long as only a very small amount of semen comes out, you have been successful. Congratulate yourself and then do it again... Up to four or five times should milk him dry. As long as his cock stays hard, have fun!

Squeeze the Base: This method is similar to squeezing the tip except that, if done right, you should not get any cum out except for the occasional small ooze. What you are doing here is to grip the base of the cock (or tie a string or put a cock ring around it) to keep the ejaculate from continuing through the penis to the tip. This can cause the semen to back up into the bladder, which is not a bad thing. It won't harm him. This is by far the BEST method as it gives the prostate a good workout and still leaves the victim as aroused as ever. In other words, it promotes good prostate health while leaving him wanting more!

Stop Stroking: This method is not so easy to learn as the others, but with practice and some keen observation you can learn to do it. Because each man is different, you will need to learn the physical indications that your submissive (or man) gives just before he ejaculates. The advantage of this method is that you can both receive a great deal of pleasure from it. What you do is simply stroke his cock until the moment that he is about to cum, then STOP. Don't touch his cock until you are sure his need to cum has subsided (somewhat), which may very well take several minutes. If you stop too soon, you have only succeeded in teasing him, which is not altogether a bad thing, but it does not produce the desired result. If you have stopped too late, he will cum. Hopefully not much, since you did stop touching him. The idea is to stop at the exact right moment so that no more than a small amount of cum will ooze out of his cock. If it spurts, squirts or shoots out, you were too late. You can repeat this process as many times as you like (assuming you are successful). It will drive him crazy, but hey, that's the point. Isn't it? I have personally spent over two hours doing this to a submissive. I never get tired of teasing them.

Slap it Down: This is a fairly easy method to use and, if you are into CBT or giving pain, then this might be the method you want to use. Just as your submissive reaches the point where he is about to cum, slap his penis and/or his balls sharply. You may have to slap it several times for the desired effect. What are doing is inducing enough pain to stop the orgasm. This will take a little practice because if you are a second too late, he will cum anyway. What you want is for him to lose at least part of his erection. You can either slap him a time or two and wait for the erection to go down a bit or you can continue slapping him as he loses his erection. Either method works just fine.

Prostate Massage: Milking the prostate is by far the healthiest method. It is more mechanical than the other methods. It also takes much less time. All this can be used as a means of humiliation and control. In practice, it's also the easiest method. The objective here is to drain your submissive of his ejaculate without allowing him the pleasure of having his cock teased. What you want to do is insert your well lubricated finger (or fingers) into his anus and gently massage his prostate gland. I strongly recommend you wear some kind of rubber glove (either surgical or dish washing type) to protect him from your fingernails.

The prostate gland is located about two inches inside the anus toward where his cock is located (see illustration). You want to insert your finger(s) so that you can bend them in that direction. If you can reach far enough (about another inch), there are two small seminal vesicles on either side of the urethra. Massaging them directly will produce the maximum amount of fluid in the shortest amount of time. However, milking the prostate three to five times, allowing your submissive to rest for a few minutes between massages, will effectively eliminate all the seminal fluid. It just takes a little longer. By the way, he does NOT need to be aroused for this kind of milking to work. It works even if he fights it.

One of the benefits of milking, no matter which method you use, is continued erection. Clinically speaking, when a male ejaculates normally, the body releases a hormone that causes the blood to flow out of the penis, thereby eliminating the erection. It also reduces the man's desire for sex. He won't want to do much of anything once he has cum. This is normal and all men know what I am talking about. Milking prevents the body from releasing this hormone and therefore, his arousal remains, both physically and mentally! Since he has not experienced a normal ejaculation, he is not yet been satisfied. Continued teasing or having him please you, is much easier. After all, he will still be in the mood for sex, he just won't be able to cum.

Mistress Ivey


  1. very instructive. All Women should understand -- and do -- this sort of disobliging control.

  2. I have read various things (with mixed opinions) about risks with anything that stops the ejaculate from coming out. As a result, we didn't use that.

    But the "stop stroking" method works very well, and my wife learned that I would start to grind my hips just as I was about to orgasm, so she would just have to watch for that to really slow down (or stop entirely) to give me a ruined orgasm.

  3. As a male who lives an orgasm denial lifestyle I like the idea of being milked and denied an orgasm just as a further show of my wife's authority, HOWEVER, I have been researching the medical side of orgasm/ejaculation denial. It appears that studies on this out of the Mayo Clinic have determined that there are no harmful effects on the prostate as a result of ejaculation denial for long periods of time. The same studies showed that there are no beneficial effects on the prostate from frequently ejaculating as published in a recent issue of the Urology Jounal. (of course I cannot say whether this study was funded by the Dominant Wive's of America Association if one exists)

    1. You are absolutely correct. I have never been able to find any actual studies (other than the one you mentioned) that anything negative to say about abstinence causing any health problems. However, it never hurts to milk a sub. Therefore, since there is no evidence to the supposed detrimental effects of long term chastity, nor to the health benefits of prostate milking... I say, have fun!

    2. Glad to hear you did not see anything different out there. I looked around since I was hoping that there would not be anything to make my wife feel obligated to allow me release or feel as though she had to milk me - but rather to give her the option without worrying about any health concerns.

  4. From when we first met my wife has always stifled my ejaculation.
    She has three methods. to squeeze the tip shut, to squeeze the base , and to fit a tight plug down my urethra for when she feels like riding my hard shaft. On occasions I have shot several times without a drop coming out.
    Now 28 years later she later she still enjoys doing this to me.

  5. You say there is no harm if little or nothing comes out during milking. And there is no harm in not milking at all. So is it fine if I use an urethral plug on him to prevent any leaking? In my experience the excess just comes out during urination without having to take the belt off. Be it sex or milking I'd prefer to prevent any ejaculation at all.

    1. I see know problem with that. As long as he is allowed to urinate now and then.


    2. Thanks a lot, Ms. Ivey. So I figure full orgasms aren't necessary either? By the way, do you believe in permanent chastity? People say it's a myth or stuff to talk about for men to get erect and it never happens. But maybe it is just psychology? Getting the most emotional feedback when concentratng on your pleasure instead of expecting to cum himself. Training for a couple of years to get him into proper mindset and only getting good experience after that. So much contraversive information on the net.
      P.S. When balls are swollen from chastity are there any extra risks with hard cbt, ballbusting in particular?

  6. Hot writing!!

    New Lover